The Greatest Man I Never Knew

I never had the privilege of meeting my father-in-law, Gary, as he passed away when my husband was only nine years old. I have heard stories through the years, but it makes me sad that I’ll never have that relationship with him and that my kids will never know their Grandpa Gary. Knowing what an incredible man my husband is, I can only imagine that Gary must have passed down some of those traits. I know that he was loved and respected by all who knew him, and having worked in various fields, he knew plenty of people. He was a literature professor at one point and eventually owned his own field tiling business. I know he enjoyed golf and loved his wife and children. As a child, I know my husband looked forward to a weekly breakfast with his dad at the regional airport, and now, he makes it a point to take our children there as well.

I remember when I was pregnant with Sullivan, I was very emotional (shocker!). One night in particular, I was crying because I was worried that if the baby were a girl, I wouldn’t have the relationship I dreamed of with a daughter. What if she didn’t like me? What if we butted heads? What if we were never close? Trying to make me feel better by finding common ground, Travis told me, “Well, if it’s a boy, what if I don’t know how to teach him to be a man? I don’t care about sports or cars and stuff, and I only had my dad for 9 years.” Well, I can assure you, our son will never need to worry about being raised to be a good man. Travis has taught him generosity, compassion, honesty, integrity, the value of hard work, a love of music, an extensive knowledge of monster trucks, and so much more. My son witnesses a father who helps with all the chores, knows how to cook, protects and supports his family in every way possible, and who treats his mother with love and kindness. He has a firm, disciplinary hand and expects honesty and respect, but also has soft, huggable arms that will always comfort and protect. He will wipe tears, sing songs, tell silly jokes, and read bedtime stories. If I could meet Gary and tell him anything, I would tell him that he has left an immense legacy behind in his son, and thus, in his grandchildren. I would assure him that Travis turned out just fine. Better than fine. And through him, in a way, I guess I have been able to meet Gary.